Is Filing for Divorce the Right Decision?

Deciding whether to end a marriage is one of the hardest choices a person can make. The emotions involved—pain, fear, sadness, and even guilt—can feel overwhelming. You may wonder if things will get better or if leaving is the best option. Many people struggle with these feelings, questioning whether they are making the right decision. If you are asking yourself, “Should I get a divorce?” know that you are not alone. 

This guide will help you think through the emotional, legal, and practical aspects of divorce so you can make the best decision for yourself and your family. If you’re ready to talk to a an attorney for more detailed information, please call our divorce lawyer today, and we’ll help you explore all your options. 

Signs That Divorce May Be the Right Choice

Every marriage has ups and downs, but certain patterns can indicate deeper problems. Here are some signs that divorce may be necessary:

1. Lack of Communication

Communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship. If you and your spouse can no longer talk without arguing, avoiding each other, or feeling unheard, it may be a sign of deeper problems. Without open and honest communication, resolving issues becomes nearly impossible. Many couples find that over time, they stop sharing their thoughts, feelings, and dreams, leading to a growing emotional distance.

2. Constant Conflict and Resentment

All couples have disagreements, but when every conversation turns into a fight, it can create long-term damage. If you and your spouse are stuck in a cycle of blame, resentment, and anger, it may be difficult to rebuild trust and respect. This is especially true if conflicts are left unresolved and continue to pile up over time, making the relationship toxic and emotionally draining.

3. Emotional or Physical Abuse

Abuse is never acceptable. If you are experiencing verbal, emotional, or physical abuse, your safety should be the top priority. Leaving an abusive relationship can be challenging, but it is often necessary for your well-being. Seeking support from friends, family, or professionals can help you take the necessary steps. Abuse often escalates over time, and staying in an abusive marriage can have long-term psychological and physical consequences.

4. Lack of Intimacy and Emotional Connection

Physical and emotional intimacy is an important part of a marriage. If you feel more like roommates than partners, or if there is a complete lack of affection, it could be a sign that the marriage is no longer fulfilling. Intimacy includes both physical closeness and emotional bonding. If efforts to reconnect have failed and one or both partners feel neglected or unloved, it may indicate a deeper issue that cannot be resolved.

5. Different Life Goals

Over time, people grow and change. If you and your spouse no longer share the same vision for the future—whether about children, careers, or lifestyle—this can create serious tension. When compromise is impossible, separation may be the best option. Differences in core values and long-term goals can cause friction and frustration, making it hard to sustain a happy and fulfilling marriage.

6. Infidelity

Cheating can deeply damage a marriage. While some couples can rebuild trust after an affair, others find it impossible to move forward. If the betrayal has caused too much pain, divorce may be the healthiest choice. Rebuilding trust after infidelity requires honesty, commitment, and effort from both partners. If one spouse is unwilling to make amends or if the betrayal is repeated, it may be a sign that the marriage cannot be repaired.

7. Financial Stress and Disagreements

Money issues are one of the leading causes of divorce. If you and your spouse constantly argue about finances, debt, or spending habits and cannot find common ground, the stress can be overwhelming. Financial strain can lead to feelings of insecurity, resentment, and a lack of trust. If one spouse is financially irresponsible or secretive about money matters, it can create major issues in the relationship.

8. Feeling Happier Alone

If you imagine a future without your spouse and feel a sense of relief or happiness, this could be a sign that divorce is the right choice. Staying in an unhappy marriage out of fear or obligation can lead to long-term emotional harm. People often stay in marriages due to societal pressure, family expectations, or fear of being alone, but prioritizing personal happiness and mental well-being is essential for a fulfilling life.

Deciding if divorce is the right choice can be very difficult. Talking to a counselor can help you understand your feelings and work through problems. You might also talk to close friends or family members for support and advice. Spending time thinking about your future and writing down your thoughts can help you figure out what you truly want. Ask yourself if your marriage can be fixed and if you would be happier staying or leaving. If you’re still unsure, speaking with a divorce lawyer can help you understand your options and what to expect.

Religious and Cultural Considerations in Divorce

Divorce is not only a legal and emotional decision but often has significant religious and cultural implications. Many faiths have specific beliefs and guidelines regarding marriage and divorce. For example, some religious traditions may require mediation or counseling before allowing a divorce, while others may have specific processes for granting religious divorce decrees, such as an annulment in the Catholic Church.

Cultural norms can also shape how individuals and communities view divorce. In some cultures, divorce may carry stigma, making it more challenging for individuals to seek support from family or friends. It is important to consider how religious and cultural beliefs influence personal decisions and seek guidance from trusted faith leaders, community support groups, or legal professionals who understand these nuances.

The Legal Aspects of Divorce in Arizona

If you decide that divorce is the right choice, you will need to understand the legal process. Divorce laws vary by state, but here in Arizona, you must consider the following factors:

Types of Divorce

• Contested Divorce – When spouses cannot agree on terms such as child custody or asset division, the court must decide.
• Uncontested Divorce – When both spouses agree on all terms, making the process faster and less expensive.
• No-Fault Divorce – Arizona is a no-fault state. This means that you do not need to prove wrongdoing; you can simply state that the marriage is irretrievably broken.
• Covenant Marriage Divorce – Arizona recognizes covenant marriages, which have stricter divorce requirements. Couples in a covenant marriage must provide specific grounds for divorce, such as adultery, abuse, or abandonment.

Child Custody and Support

If you have children, custody and support arrangements will be a major part of the divorce. Arizona courts prioritize the child’s best interests, considering factors like parental involvement, financial stability, and the child’s needs. Parents must also consider co-parenting arrangements, visitation schedules, and long-term emotional support for their children.

Arizona law uses the terms legal decision-making and parenting time instead of custody. Legal decision-making refers to who has authority over major decisions regarding the child’s health, education, and welfare, while parenting time determines how much time each parent spends with the child. Child support is calculated based on Arizona’s Child Support Guidelines, which consider each parent’s income, parenting time, and expenses like healthcare and education.

Division of Assets and Debts

Arizona follows community property laws, meaning that all assets and debts acquired during the marriage are considered jointly owned and must be divided equally. This includes:

• Real estate and personal property.
• Bank accounts and retirement funds.
• Debts and liabilities.

However, property acquired before the marriage, through inheritance, or as a gift is typically considered separate property and is not subject to division.

Alimony

Alimony, or spousal support, may be granted if one spouse earns significantly more than the other. The amount and duration depend on factors like the length of the marriage and financial need. Courts consider employment status, earning potential, and the contributions of each spouse to the marriage.

Filing for Divorce

To start the divorce process in Arizona, you must:

1. File a Petition for Dissolution of Marriage – One spouse (the petitioner) must file the necessary documents with the court.
2. Serve Divorce Papers – The other spouse (the respondent) must be formally notified of the divorce.
3. Wait for a Response – The respondent has 20 days to respond if served in Arizona or 30 days if served outside the state.
4. Negotiate Terms or Go to Court – If both spouses agree on the terms, they can submit a consent decree. If not, mediation or court proceedings may be necessary.
5. Finalize the Divorce – Arizona has a 60-day waiting period after filing before a divorce can be finalized.

Understanding Arizona’s divorce laws can help you prepare for the process and make informed decisions about your future.

Alternatives to Divorce in Phoenix Arizona

What if I’m not sure I want to divorce? Are there alternatives?

While divorce is a final legal dissolution of marriage, there are alternative options that may be more suitable depending on your situation. A knowledgeable Phoenix divorce attorney can help you explore these alternatives and determine the best course of action for you.

Legal Separation

Legal separation allows couples to live apart while remaining legally married. This can be a good option for those who need time to evaluate their marriage, maintain benefits such as health insurance, or follow religious beliefs that discourage divorce. In Arizona, legal separation involves many of the same legal processes as divorce, including property division, child custody, and spousal support agreements.

Mediation and Counseling

Mediation can help couples resolve conflicts and improve communication without immediately resorting to divorce. A neutral third party, often an attorney or professional mediator, facilitates discussions to reach mutually agreeable solutions. Marriage counseling with a licensed therapist may also help address relationship issues and create a path toward reconciliation.

Trial Separation

A trial separation is an informal arrangement where spouses live apart to evaluate whether they want to continue their marriage. Unlike legal separation, there are no formal legal agreements, but it can provide space to reflect on the relationship.

How a Lawyer Can Help

Navigating divorce or alternative options can be legally complex and emotionally draining. A skilled family law attorney can provide essential guidance whether you are considering a legal separation, mediation, or another alternative. A lawyer can:

• Explain Arizona’s family laws and how they apply to your situation.
• Help negotiate fair terms for property division, child custody, and financial support.
• Represent your interests in court or mediation proceedings.
• Provide legal protections and ensure agreements are enforceable.

Having a knowledgeable attorney on your side can make the process smoother and help you make informed decisions about your future.

Making the Best Choice for You

Deciding whether to file for divorce is deeply personal. There is no right or wrong answer—only what is best for you. If you are feeling uncertain, speaking with a trusted attorney or counselor can help you gain clarity. Remember, whatever you decide, you deserve a future filled with happiness and peace.

Whether you need assistance with asset division, child custody, spousal support, or mediation, having a knowledgeable attorney by your side can make all the difference.

Phoenix family law attorney at the Law Office of Cosmas Onyia are dedicated to helping clients navigate the complexities of divorce with compassion and expertise. Contact us today to schedule a consultation and take the first step toward securing your future. Your path to a new beginning starts here.